My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
