isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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