I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
