Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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