oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
