wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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