Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
