Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
No stitches, just platelets and will power
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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