i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
