I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
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