Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
