I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
