Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
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