5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Randomize
