omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
I think I won the penis lottery.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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