you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
how drunk are you?
Several
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Randomize
