oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize