you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
