he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
