they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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