Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
