am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
