Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
