The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize