I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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