He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Randomize
