even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
