Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
