Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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