Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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