He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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