how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Randomize
