To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
