Fuck appropriateness.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
