Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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