so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
