Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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