i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
She bit a glass in half.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
