rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
