I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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