time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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