How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
