Where is the hickey?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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