a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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