If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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