don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
