I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
