I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
You've changed since you got that strap on
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
