He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
Randomize