On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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